The Broke Vegan

Laughter and Spinach are the Best Medicines

Food Bender: A Screen Play

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Scene opens girl lying on bed, comatose

Alarm blasts obnoxiously

“RIIING! RIIING! Here’s your real world wake up call of AGONY! RIIING!!”

Girl mumbles in veg-esque state. Slaps alarm.

Alarm continues it’s unrelenting attack on her oratory senses

“RIIING! RIIING! Monday post vacation!- you have to WORK TODAY!! RIIING!!

Girl rolls over onto especially bloated stomach. Manages to silence alarm by ripping phone out of socket. Collapses back into sheets

Girl rubs eyes….

Murhshuerourrrpp – where am I? What happened to me?”

Cut to Flashbacks Scene:
Granola & dried fruit
Oreos & Father’s Day Ice Cream cake
Potatoes
Fried…. fried life
Pasta
Shellfish
….didn’t mean to eat that…..
Homemade Italian Meatballs…(REALLY didn’t mean to eat those either)
Bread. Lots of Bread. Loaves of Bread. Garlic, Wheat, Potato, Multigrain
Peanut Butter crackers
Custard
(which wasn’t even that good!)
1/2 Krispy Kreme Donut

Girl groans

Ugggghhhh…….”

Girl stumbles into bathroom & comes face to face with her worst fear. Lets out an inadvertent cry of horror

5lbs?! AHHHH!!! NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!”

Girl sinks into fetal position on a bathroom floor (which is in serious need of a washing)

WHY?! What happened to my good-health/happy vegan/no animal products life style?!”

Cut to:Image of big, happy Italian family pushing meat & potatoes onto girl’s plate with guilt-filled puppy dog eyes.

Camera flys out above girl

NOOOOOO!!!!”

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Author: asabilia

A 20-something outside of NYC - my mantra - "eat without violence...cheaply"

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